We’re down to our last two months and Dr. Matthews and I are getting so anxious to meet little Miss Natalie Rose! He even dreamt about her the other night and he NEVER remembers his dreams. I keep picturing her coming out with this dark head of hair- the doctor said she has a lot of it (which is causing a lot of indigestion for me!) but no idea what color it is yet. From our 3D ultrasound, I think she looks like Dr. Matthews’s side of the family, though, and they all have beautiful dark hair.
I’ve had a relatively easy pregnancy (as easy as it can be, anyway) and am not too worried about labor or being a new mom. I figure there will be plenty of worry when the time comes and I’m really just very excited. However, there are moments when I feel like, “What did I just get myself into?!” I sort of equate it to the experience of waiting in line for and riding a roller coaster.
I grew up in Ohio not far from Cedar Point and the now closed-down Geauga Lake amusement parks, and riding roller coasters is one of my absolute favorite pastimes. I am not, however, above having some apprehension about it. Initially, you just can’t wait to be at the front of the line (I have waited several hours to ride a coaster before) and are so envious of all the riders you see whirling past you in the carts as the ride goes by. You would give anything to be out of the hot sun and under the shade of the overhang, which also means you’re that much closer to getting on.
Finally, you are the envy of all of those in the back of the line. You are getting into the cart and being strapped in and your heart rate picks up and you’re smiling like a big goof ball and looking around at your friends getting all jazzed up together because you’re ALMOST RIDING THE RIDE FINALLY!! You begin your ascent up the initial (and normally tallest) hill and suddenly you’re getting closer to the top and you start to think that maybe this wasn’t such a good idea and this hill didn’t seem so high from on the ground but now you’re 100% locked in and there is NOTHING you can do to get out of it now. But thousands of people have ridden this ride before and lived to tell the tale so surely it’s going to be ok, right?
That’s sort of how I feel about giving birth and caring for a newborn. Sometimes. Like I said, mostly I’m just excited because I have waited a long time for this and I knew what I signed up for when I got in line. Now I’m strapped in and climbing that hill…